It’s Seems Like Everything Will Be Okay.

I received an unexpected blessing and I’m waiting on the confirmation however I have the feeling that it’s going to be okay. I don’t have a sinking feeling , more of an anxious feeling ,I’m excited for something new . It is in these moments that I am more aware that God is in control , a day ago before the unexpected happened I saw a photo that said “God is still writing your story, quit trying to steal the pen” . I am only human so naturally after the unexpected happened I was filled with worry that maybe I didn’t do well. Today I acknowledge that what God has for me it is for me. I know that when the praises go up the blessings come down and if God says that it’s time then no one including myself can stop him. I will wait for the melodies from heaven so that all the work I do will blessed abundantly . I asked God for one thing but he blessed me with another and God knows best. To all of you waiting on a blessing like me, waiting for God to say that it’s time. Remember that God has the pen, he’s already written your story and no one can take the pen from him not even you. – My

The song of this post is:

Melodies From Heaven by Kirk Franklin

I witnessed a mother weight shame her teenage daughter.

I’m sure that many people especially plus sized ones can identify when I say this but I got a sudden wave of anger. Here’s why , the girl was maybe a size 15 or 16 (American) and on top of that she was only 15 or 16 years old .An age where self esteem and confidence needs to be nurtured before the young adult years come in and she finds her worth in other things or through other people. It was like looking in a minuscule mirror and I remember all the criticism I received about my body when I was young . I still follow them and hide my flaws as an adult. Rather than criticising our children’s appearance tarnishing there self esteem before they fully understand what it means ,we should tell our sons , daughters and non binary children they are beautiful , handsome , strong and brave. We should create a standard in our households that encourages our children’s individuality and self esteem , we should teach them that appearance isn’t everything it’s about the heart of it all. If we nurture are children when there young , when they are our age the will be able to stand tall with pride and full of a self love that’s hard to come by these days. To those of you like me who stand in the mirror looking for flaws only to strategically hide them. I believe that there will come a day where we won’t care anymore and on that day may we smile big from our core with happiness. – My

The song of the day is :

Shawn Mendes “Fallin All In You”

There’s something so cynical about being in your twenties

I’m not sure whether it’s the sarcasm that spans across the Internet but the thing I’m certain of is that we feel the same emotions . Right now politics and ethics are the core of sarcasm because it feels like every man and women for themselves .People are stubborn and not open to conversation and to put it simply some people are beyond speaking to. It’s kinda of funny that we as a generation live all over the world with different world views but we experience the same things. We laugh at many of the same things , we scream at many of the same things and it occurred to me that our emotions have brought us closer. Maybe this is why twitter thrives you can instantaneously share your thoughts or a joke and even tell a story using a thread and then get feed back from people who agree with as well as people who disagree with you. When you tell a story you can meet people who have experienced things the same as you or similar to you. The cynicism doesn’t stop with politics or ethics , if you haven’t scrolled through twitter and read the opinions on dating and why both men and women are trash then we should trade twitter feeds. All of these tweets stemming from broken hearts that haven’t been mended. For those of us who are attempting to plan for our future and have a retirement plan in order to retire with out worry and send our kids to school without debt . I assure you we have many things to say about social security and the national debt average . So to my twenty somethings that feel like we have nothing to look forward to, I want you to know that trouble dont last always and as we age we heal , we’re only getting better with time and we’re just getting started. Remember to breathe. – My

Is this a pre mid life crisis ?

I’m 24 years old and I am mentally in this place where my career is slowly settling into place and it seems my mind has moved on to other things. Suddenly there’s this desire to fall in love and have a family, suddenly I can hear this invisible clock ticking . Most of the time the ticking is minimal and only apparent when mind wanders to the thought of having a significant other. However when I’m invited to a wedding ,baby shower or engagement dinner that sound of a clock ticking turns into my heart pounding and then I’m suddenly overcome with worry. It feels like I’m running out of time , I’m aware that being twenty-four is a commodity to people older than me that love to say “wow, at twenty-four I was at the peak of my wild years , you couldn’t tell me I wasn’t everything”. Sincerely I wish I felt this sentiment , I wish with many fibers of my being that I didn’t see other couples walking with there children and think ” one day soon , I hope”. In saying this I’m not saying that my lust or thrill for life is gone , I still want to travel and see the world for all of it’s beautiful chaos but I’d be open to seeing the world with my family instead of alone. My life has taught me many lesson in friendships , relationships and work relations and for me personally it seems like I’m ready to put all that I’ve learned to use. It is with that thought that I can say I’M NOT IN ANY RUSH to get married or have a baby .In my honest opinion these are things worth waiting for and worth putting in the time and effort it takes to sustain them. I don’t feel like my mind is moving to fast I just feel like my hearts in the right place and that in time this will be my reality. So to the people in there 20s having the same thoughts as me , when the time comes we will know and I hope that family life with it’s highs and its lows is everything we dreamed it could be and more. – My